We’ve all felt it. Some of us for most of our lives. It goes hand-in-hand with being wrong.
For me, before I could even speak, I was sorry. Sorry I didn’t do the proverbial “it” right. There have been many “its” and lots of shame.
Shame: a painful feeling
caused by injury to one’s self-respect
I like this definition. It stands to reason that if we had a well-formed sense of self-respect, we would naturally want to protect it. Trouble is, when a foundation of self is built on shame there’s no room left for respect. It’s like a Zen koan.
I’m not talking about the healthy emotion which is more accurately named guilt. Guilt warns of intrusion, of stepping out of integrity with ourselves. Guilt equals I’ve done wrong. With shame the response is I AM wrong.
Shame holds us hostage, controls our actions. Even when our rebellious attitude says, “I-don’t-give-a-bleep-what-you-think/say/feel,” shame is the puppet master, holding the strings.
Shaman: an intermediary between
the visible and spirit worlds
I’ve always traveled easily between the seen and unseen realms—probably because it was safer being out of my body than it was being in it.
loosening its grip
The work is done in the body, through the body, with heart, with compassion. We listen to what shame has to say. We create a safe space for clearing those deep, dark, shame-on-me memories—the ones that literally suck the life from us, thwarting our ability to truly thrive and celebrate life.
For me, the voice of shame rang clearly with, “You can’t do that. You can’t say that. And you certainly can’t be seen like that!”
Today, thanks to finely honed spiritual navigation skills and support from powerful allies, I’ve disengaged the shame core. It wasn’t an easy process or a quick fix, but it’s the most important work I’ve done so far in my life. Today I have self-respect, a sense of personal power, and purpose.
I am a Shame Shaman and I welcome you to explore your path of healing and integration with me.